"I don't know about "Through the Wormhole", sounds interesting though. I wish I could be plugged into that level more, those glimpses into how vast existence actually is, and how small that makes us. "
Lauren commented that from my last post.
It made me think immediately of my darkest moments when I was very sure I wasn't long for this Earth. We are insignificant in the grand scheme. Of course, this scheme.. our own existence rattles with fear at the huge concept of mortality.
When I think of space, time and the universe it makes me feel better about dying. I am a blip on a blip on a grain of sand on a zillion Earths beaches.
My brain can't comprehend space as it cannot comprehend no longer existing.
But we all stop existing. More of us pop up with different faces and the cycle is never ending.
I also like to watch water, especially rivers. I love that they will keep moving for ages. Eventually they'll carve a new path for themselves but water will always move and bend and remain constant.
It gives me peace.
Thinking of atoms and the elements that create our bodies, our world... just floating in space ready to create another world like our own when the conditions are right.. gives me peace.
The things that make me sad (and I'm sure I've mentioned this) is leaving my world behind. My personal Earth experience.
I can close my eyes and think of the first time I was awed by chlorophyll. Laying in our backyard and looking up through the leaves and seeing a symphony of greens in the canopy filled me with warmth. The rustling of the leaves, the smell of the air.. the sounds of the Earth. My skin, so happy to feel the breeze move across its surface. Tickling the tiny hairs on my arms and face... telling me its story.
Finding rocks and loving them. Awed at their striations, glittering mica or smoothed by water. Collecting sticks and leaves and broken egg shells. I have always been madly in love with the Earth. MADLY. When I go outside, when I sit quietly and let go of myself, that is my prayer.
To leave that love is hard to accept.
So tender and vulnerable, floating out there in space. A sudden pulse of radioactivity from the sun, an exploding star near to us.. a giant asteroid. Even my precious ball of iron will one day expire.
So what's the big deal?
"I also like to watch water, especially rivers. I love that they will keep moving for ages"
ReplyDeleteYou captured something huge for me, the reason I collected beach glass as a kid. This was roughly in 1870 so no one can say I was trying to be hip. I just found it spectacular that a piece of glass could have been thrown on the sand bottom over & over so many times that it could be smooth like the pieces I found. It does give you a measure of endless time…..
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"Finding rocks and loving them. Awed at their striations, glittering mica or smoothed by water"
Fossils are like that for me. You find even the most "mundane" one, it's millions of years old. Sometimes hundreds of millions of years old. Nothing better than that to stick you in your tiny little sand-speck timeframe.
So no, no big deal. While at the same time, huge deal!